“No beer and no TV make Homer… something something.”
“Mom, is dad going to kill us?”
“We’ll just have to wait and see.”
The eating of an orange is a lot like a good marriage.
‘Asleep at the switch?’ I wasn’t asleep, I was drunk!
So i said ‘look buddy, your car was upside down when I got here. and as for your grandma, she shouldn’t have mouthed off like that!’
They should call this book “Johnny deformed!”
Oh, gee, a joke. Um… Um… Uh, funny, uh, okay. Uh, this guy walks into a bar and takes out a tiny piano and twelve-inch pianist. Oh hoho, no, wait!
My bologna has a first name,
it’s h-o-m-e-r
my bologna has a second name,
it’s h-o-m-e-r
“I guess every father thinks his daughter is the cutest.”
“Well, now there’s a way to prove it!”
“Wow, it’s president of Laramie Cigarettes, Jack Larson!”
“This year Laramie is sponsoring the Little Miss Springfield Pageant. You see, government regulations prohibit us from advertising on TV, (ah, that sweet Carolina smoke) but they can’t prohibit us from hosting a beauty pageant for little girls aged 7 to 9.”
Hey there Blimpy-boy,
flying through the air so fancy free
